We all do it, judge others by comparing their lives to ours. We don't mean to judge but through our comments it can sound like we are. The comments we make are often because we think that we have the answers for others' issues.
We are on the outside of their lives looking in. It can give us a more pure perspective. Still, none of us have the answers to another person's problems, even though we think you should or should have done it like I did. That doesn't mean that it would have worked for him/her.
Sometimes, we are so concerned and so badly want others to do well that we come off as judging when we make suggestions. We forget that we have issues that, should we share them, others would want to give swift answers to also. We would then understand how some of our responses sound.
Sometimes, we are so concerned and so badly want others to do well that we come off as judging when we make suggestions. We forget that we have issues that, should we share them, others would want to give swift answers to also. We would then understand how some of our responses sound.
We don't always listen carefully when others ask for opinions or suggestions. Because of this, we can be guilty of giving the same answers over and over, cliches, standard comments, time-worn suggestions, etc. People already know the stock answers and are seeking more than that.
Platitudes are not working for them anymore, if they ever did. They feel judged when they are callously told to do more of what they have been doing, such as believe, accept, hope, adapt. There are, however, two things that will help if suggested, even if they are already doing them.
The only perfect answers to give anyone are to read the Bible more often and study it more deeply. The second suggestion is to pray more candidly to God, to be more honest as never before. Those are answers that will help anyone and everyone.
The only perfect answers to give anyone are to read the Bible more often and study it more deeply. The second suggestion is to pray more candidly to God, to be more honest as never before. Those are answers that will help anyone and everyone.
If the praying and Bible reading is not helping, then the only perfect answer is between that person and God. God will have to reveal, through His Holy Spirit, what the answer is to their dilemma. We can only give comforting sympathetic or empathetic, unique words of faith.
While it is motivating and encouraging to us to give advice, we must be careful that we are not discouraging and overwhelming others with ultimatums of performance. Our comments, suggestions and guidance should uplift, inspire and edify through God's grace. Ephesians 4:29